The first chapter of Colossians includes Paul’s prayer for his readers. In it he prays that God will grant them wisdom and knowledge and enable them to bear good fruit and do good works. Then he adds, “being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that….”

I stopped there.

What was it that Paul felt the Colossians needed God’s power for? Victory over enemies? Personal piety? Signs and wonders? Rescuing others? Does God’s power make his followers superheroes so they can fight crime and bring order into the world?

No. Paul prays for the Colossians to be “strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that [they] may have great endurance and patience.” Endurance and patience. Endurance means bearing hardship or pain rather than trying to escape it. Patience means respecting the agency of others over their own lives. Both are necessary because both are characteristics of love. “Love is patient,” Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 13. “Love endures all things,” he added a little later.

To the natural mind, this sounds a lot like passivity, letting events unfold without taking action, letting other people make decisions without attempting to influence them. But that is not what Paul means. In any situation that causes us pain or discomfort, there is always a temptation to do whatever is necessary to alleviate our suffering, but love calls for us to accept some suffering when doing so brings about good for those we love. So new mothers lose sleep to tend to their babies, and spouses surrender their career ambitions to build resilient relationships with their partners. Making other-centered decisions as love demands requires all the glorious might of God’s power because it goes so against our own proclivities to put our own interests first.

This kind of love is more than intelligent self-interest (although it may lead to better outcomes for the lover as well as the beloved) and more than delayed-gratification (although love also takes a long view of things). However, it is also not self-martyrdom, which is a form of manipulation. Love never seeks to manipulate or coerce even when it is clear that the beloved is making self-harming choices. It always tries to persuade with gracious truth. Love rejoices in the truth, accepting the risk of rejection to obtain a wholehearted response rather than settling for grudging consent.

God’s awesome power is available to us, not to impress others or fulfill our own lusts, but to endure suffering and persecution and to be patient even with our enemies, knowing that just as God converted Saul on the road to Damascus, so he may also convert those who oppose us when they see how we repay evil with gentleness and kindness.